Trust

Ever said something along the lines of, “I trust God with ________?” because I have. I’d be lying if I said I always mean it though. Yes, I’m a Christian and said I don’t always trust God with all of the things. I’m working on it though.

One of the times I spoke on missions and Haiti, I told those there that God is in the yes but also in the no. I’ve recently come to the realization that is the case for relocating in all of life’s aspects. Years back when I realized God had given me a heart for missions, I was ALL IN and ready to go wherever He would send me. I truly thought serving through missions was what my purpose was…but it didn’t pan out. Fast forward a few years and then there was Haiti. I view Haiti as a gift from God. Especially Piatre, Haiti. I miss it and the incredible people so much. There’s something special and sacred about that place and I truly long to return there sooner than later but I have had to accept that there might not be another opportunity on this side of eternity to return to such a sweet place.

Personally, I’ve learned that there are a lot of things I truly need to work on in my own life and heart before I am ready to “settle down” with anyone and that’s okay. Plus in the news, there have been too many stories of folks meeting on apps with the ending of murder and I’d rather not be a statistic.

Career-wise…I’ve tried to leave my company on a few occasions. The missions door was closed abruptly almost 7 years ago and while that was far more painful in regards to rejection, my sweet boss told me that where we are is my mission field as God has allowed me many opportunities to pray over people throughout various stages of their lives. From marriages to adoptions, I never want to lose the wonder that comes with that honor.

It’s comical to sit back and reflect on things because after being a bridesmaid in well over 20 weddings, I’ve now had the privilege of officiating 2. Such sweetness in both couples and unions. One was even in front of the courthouse so working where I am, it allowed me to walk over mid day to officiate and then head back to my office.

I’m learning that truly trusting God with going means trusting Him with staying and I’m finally good with that. I’m thankful for the lessons he graciously teaches in the midst of hard seasons and the fact that no waiting (or staying) is ever wasted.